50 Reasons a Dog is Better than
a Man
1. Spots are an attractive feature on a dog.
2. A dog is better protection from intruders.
3. Dogs enjoy ball games. But they don't spend six
hours on the phone trying to get tickets for France
98.
4. Dogs greet each other by sniffing bottoms. Men
are far less polite.
5. Puppy love doesn't wear off so quickly with a
dog.
6. You can be prosecuted for neglecting a dog.
7. Dogs can find their way back home - even after
a really heavy night out.
8. Dogs can be trained not to lie on the bed. Men
always lie in bed.
9. A dog can moult without becoming obsessed about
premature baldness.
10. Dogs can be taught the
meaning of the word "NO!"
12. When dogs beg, it's cute. When men beg it's pathetic.
13. A 'King Charles' is much more likely to be a
big, floppy-eared dog than a big floppy-eared man.
14. You can also call a dog schitzu without offending
it.
15. "Working like a dog" is
strenuous. Working like a man is, er - not.
16. You can fondle your dog in the park without being
arrested.
17. A dog will encourage you to lose weight by taking
more exercise. A man will just remark on how big your
bum looks.
18. Dogs do not attack other dogs for being a different
colour.
19. Having a dog around the place can actually ease
stress.
20. You'd feel guilty about turning a dog out on
the street.
21. A dog can take a barrel of brandy to a lost mountaineer
without drinking ANY.
22. There aren't so many good reasons to keep a dog
muzzled in public.
23. You can buy a dog's affection with a squeaky
toy.
24. A dog will be eager to walk, rather than getting
a taxi.
25. Most dogs are really good with children.
26. Dogs have a highly-developed sense of smell.
Men, on the other hand, can quite happily wear the
same pair of pants for a fortnight.
27. A dog is more useful for tracking down criminals.
28. Who did YOU miss most from Blue Peter - John
Noakes or Shep?
29. A dog might actually take a bath of its own accord.
30. There's more chance of your dog being able to
operate the video recorder.
31. You can buy a choke-chain for a dog.
32. A 16-year-old dog is very mature.
33. A dog is easier to keep well-groomed.
34. Dogs have more chance of receiving an award for
bravery.
35. Dogs are easier to house-train.
36. Dog do not scratch themselves so much in polite
company.
37. A dog can look as though it understands what
you're saying.
38. Dogs went into space first.
39. A man will roll over and play dead only if you
ask him to get up and make coffee.
40. Dogs enjoy swimming, and not for the chance to
ogle girls in bikinis.
41. Being a dog's mistress is no reason to feel ashamed.
42. You can keep your dog tied up if it starts misbehaving.
43. Saggy skin and a hang-dog look aren't half as
appealing on a man.
44. A dog in a studded collar isn't kinky.
45. Few men would answer to 'Lassie'.
46. A dog is a pack animal. A man is a six-pack animal.
47. Dogs spend the day sniffing drugs only if they're
with the police.
48. Dogs aren't obsessed with 'doing it man-fashion'.
49. A dog is a faithful companion.
50. A dog is for life.
